➷ Parenting With Love and Logic Free ➭ Author Foster W. Cline – 9tvuk.us

Parenting With Love and Logic This Parenting Book Shows You How To Raise Self Confident, Motivated Children Who Are Ready For The Real World Learn How To Parent Effectively While Teaching Your Children Responsibility And Growing Their Character Establish Healthy Control Through Easy To Implement Steps Without Anger, Threats, Nagging, Or Power Struggles Indexed For Easy Reference

Is a well-known author, some of his books are a fascination for readers like in the Parenting With Love and Logic book, this is one of the most wanted Foster W. Cline author readers around the world.

➷ Parenting With Love and Logic  Free ➭ Author Foster W. Cline – 9tvuk.us
  • Hardcover
  • 271 pages
  • Parenting With Love and Logic
  • Foster W. Cline
  • English
  • 08 August 2018
  • 1576839540

10 thoughts on “Parenting With Love and Logic

  1. says:

    I bought this book, as well as 4 other parenting books, so that I could compare a bunch of different theories and techniques and decide what spoke to me I found it interesting and there was plenty that was useful, however there was a lot that I didn t agree with I think that there are a lot of responses to children that they call Logical consequences that I call punishment all dressed up in disguise I don t know how this couldn t come across as inauthentic to children and getannoying I bought this book, as well as 4 other parenting books, so that I could compare a bunch of different theories and techniques and decide what spoke to me I found it interesting and there was plenty that was useful, however there was a lot that I didn t agree with I think that there are a lot of responses to children that they call Logical consequences that I call punishment all dressed up in disguise I don t know how this couldn t come across as inauthentic to children and getannoying to them as they get older I was disturbed by the idea of the option that if children aren t behaving than maybe they are choosing to be shut in their rooms with a towel between the door and the door jam to keep the door essentially locked shut This would be very traumatic for my toddler and it isn t at all the message that I want to send I also don t think that I could send my child to daycare or school without clothes or outside on a cold day without a coat if they weren t ready on time, etc However, I am sure there will come a time when using such a method will be useful When I was in HS, I had to pay for a cab to school when I missed the school bus That was a reasonable and effective logical consequence.I recommend Positive Discipline , which incorporates logical consequences, but they aren t just punishments in disguise, and it seems to me to be a muchcompassionate way to parent

  2. says:

    This book advocates parenting methods that, if followed, could in some cases amount to child abuse neglect For example, the book suggests that if a two year old doesn t behave appropriately at dinner, the parents should deny him food until morning The authors also suggest that if a 6 month old throws his bottle, the parents should withhold it until the next meal At least one thing advocated by the authors is actually illegal They assert that it is the child s problem not the parents proble This book advocates parenting methods that, if followed, could in some cases amount to child abuse neglect For example, the book suggests that if a two year old doesn t behave appropriately at dinner, the parents should deny him food until morning The authors also suggest that if a 6 month old throws his bottle, the parents should withhold it until the next meal At least one thing advocated by the authors is actually illegal They assert that it is the child s problem not the parents problem if the child flunks because of constantly arriving late to school Making sure that the kids get to school actually is the parents legal responsibility they can be prosecuted when the kids don t go The authors allege that they intend to respect kids by giving them choices, but the choices suggested in this book and the sample dialogues between parents and children sound contrived and demeaning, never respectful The suggested dialogues with toddlers are just ridiculous these people must not have spent much time with their own kids when they were toddlers or they would know that no toddler would understand the speeches that they suggest Finally, the tone of this book is that parents must be at constant war with their children, always thinking about how to outsmart them, which I think is a terrible approach to parenting

  3. says:

    I really wanted to like this book I strongly agree with the philosophy of giving children logical consequences rather than engaging in power struggles and shouting matches, or just parenting by incessant nagging without follow through yes, guilty But frankly I found a lot of their practical tips completely unrealistic and therefore of limited usefulness For instance Bedtime, like many other control issues, can be defused by giving up control Parents tend to underestimate children s need I really wanted to like this book I strongly agree with the philosophy of giving children logical consequences rather than engaging in power struggles and shouting matches, or just parenting by incessant nagging without follow through yes, guilty But frankly I found a lot of their practical tips completely unrealistic and therefore of limited usefulness For instance Bedtime, like many other control issues, can be defused by giving up control Parents tend to underestimate children s need for just a tiny bit of control all they want is a little control, not the whole enchilada So far, so good Give the child limited control He has to stay in his room, but he may have the door open or closed, light on or off, music on or off, be in bed or out of bed, sleep or not sleep You give him the opportunity to get as much sleep as he needs, but you can t force him to sleep Makes sense But then The child who hasn t had enough sleep is going to be one obnoxious little dude in the morning It s the obnoxiousness we consequence, not the number of hours he sleeps Say to the child, You need to spendtime in your room because you re cranky The child will probably say, Well, I didn t get enough sleep last nightemphasis mineAnd your reply Good thinking The lesson will hit home Okay has any child, anywhere, ever acknowledged that they were emotional, moody, and overreacting because they were tired Many adults won t even acknowledge this In my experience, suggesting to a fraught child that they may be getting angry because they re tired just brings an increased frenzy I am NOT tired, I m angry because YOU RE THE MEANEST MOTHER IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD exact quote On temper tantrums Kids will throw tantrums only as long as they work Kids never seem to scream and pound the floor when they re alone in their room, but the show goes on when they have a captive audience This is laughably, demonstrably false It would be hilarious except that it s so widely believed that it creates a pernicious judgmentalism among the relatives of those of us with rage prone children I know for a fact that our daughter s grandparents believe she throws tantrums only because we clearly must give in and let her have her way when she screams though they ve never observed us doing this because we don t.How to keep kids in their rooms If I can t change his behavior, I change the location Send him to his room, of course But how to enforce that A void physically carrying the child to his room When the child is around age two, a statement I want you go to go your room, and I want you to go now spoken firmly and with index finger pointing toward the room will usually get results Do these people actually have children Well, reading on, they do acknowledge that you may need to thenshut and lock the doorto get the child to stay in the room Yes, that s way better than physically carrying the child to his room My kids don t even have doors on their rooms, so yeah, not going to happen Another helpful tip if your child frequently wakes you in the night because he is frightened or having trouble sleeping, call a babysitter and go sleep at a hotel for the nightMaybe multiple nights The babysitter, who has been prepped in advance, is supposed to make helpful conversation with the child, such as implying that if the child continues to get up in the night, the parents may spend every night away from home If the child wakes the babysitter in the night, she is supposed to say I don t know what to do with kids who get up in the middle of the night, because I don t know any kids who do that, and go back to sleep Right, that ll probably work.Many of their solutions, in fact, involve bringing in friends or accomplices who have been prepped with lines or roles to play, which always puts me in mind of the one armed friend from Arrested Development And that s why you always leave a note

  4. says:

    I loved this book, but in the end couldn t give itthan 3 stars, probably closer to a 3.5 First of all, it has some absolutely wonderful tips on parenting children Giving children choices instead of losing your cool, and putting the ball in their court, making them be the one to have to make a choice, really is a great construct if you can remember to put it into practice Then there was the whole section on money that I loved, talking about helping your children manage their own finances I loved this book, but in the end couldn t give itthan 3 stars, probably closer to a 3.5 First of all, it has some absolutely wonderful tips on parenting children Giving children choices instead of losing your cool, and putting the ball in their court, making them be the one to have to make a choice, really is a great construct if you can remember to put it into practice Then there was the whole section on money that I loved, talking about helping your children manage their own finances from a very young age It gave great tips and reminded you to not micromanage, letting them spending it how they wanted, even if it was giving the money to a sibling to do their chores That s their prerogative But finding instances where they are responsible for their own money management was a little harder for me I homeschool and so I can t take their suggestion of making my child pay for his own school lunches Besides letting them learn their lesson and go hungry when they forget the money was a little to far fetched for me Especially at a such a young age my one son is 5 yrs old and my twins are 2 yrs old This was another issue I had with the book I had generally younger kids and it seemed like a lot of the advice was geared toward slightly older kids Sure they mentioned a few times that their was advice for both, and you had to do some discerning, however I would have liked that they be a littlespecific, maybe dividing the book into sections for different age ranges and what was applicable for all age ranges Then there s the issue of just letting them fail and dealing with the consequences To a certain extent this is possible, but I m not sure it s always the best solution Again a lot depends on the age ranges as well If we tell a child he should touch a knife, or he ll cut himself and then just sit back and wait, a ten year old might be smart enough to listen, but a two year old could just as easily disregard your advice, not understanding the adult is trying to keep them safe They kind of insinuate anyone who doesn t agree just wasn t brought up this way and isn t used to it But I think there s something to be said for parental instinct as well I can t tell you how many times I went against a doctor s advice when my gut was telling me something else, and every time I felt I ended up doing the right thing It s the old adage a mom knows best In the end, I still think this book has some merit It has come great principles and methods for parents who are struggling with different behavioral problems or are at their wits end It will give you a new way of looking at things and there s nothing wrong with any parent trying to get better at parenting But don t ignore that parental voice in your head if it s telling you something else Often it s coming from a sense only you can see and feel ClassicsDefined.com

  5. says:

    I have mixed feelings about this book.Here s what I liked about this book The emphasis on consequences It makes sense that, in order to learn about the real world, children should be allowed to experience consequences within reason so they can alter their behavior And consequences cannot be given unless choices are also offered, within reason I agree with that, too Also, I loved that they pointed out several times how important it is to model good behavior for your children I wholehe I have mixed feelings about this book.Here s what I liked about this book The emphasis on consequences It makes sense that, in order to learn about the real world, children should be allowed to experience consequences within reason so they can alter their behavior And consequences cannot be given unless choices are also offered, within reason I agree with that, too Also, I loved that they pointed out several times how important it is to model good behavior for your children I wholeheartedly agree And now, the juicy stuff Here s what I didn t like I m a mom to a two year old, not a teenager but they rarely seem to preface which age bracket would apply to certain scenarios Obviously, the section titled Pacifiers was meant for toddlers and thank HEAVENS Logan weaned off the pacifier a few months ago, or I probably would have ended up in tears over that chapter , but as for some of the other situations, I wasn t sure There is a specific Love and Logic book geared especially for toddlers, but it s not at my public library, and after reading this one I m not sure I want to hunt it down Also, some of the sample dialogue of a parent with a child was hard to read without sarcasm hardly very loving They did warn against sarcasm in a chapter tucked away in the middle of the book, but to avoid it completely might be hard for parents Phrases like gee, son, I m sorry that you got a D on your report card that s a real bummer or nice try, son, but you ll have to think of another solution could be said with love, but just parroting the book isn t going to cut it in fact, it could easily morph into one of the most unloving things you could say Maybe this saysabout me than about the book, but a lot of that sample dialogue made the parents out to be snide and manipulative Lastly I don t really agree with how they say we should teach our kids about money I went to a class during BYU Education Week that was a little off beat on the whole allowance issue, saying that kids need less emphasis on learning money management andemphasis on learning generosity I tend to agree with that school of thought though how exactly I want to implement that, I m not sure yet This book, though, took the money management thing to the extreme Example kids who wouldn t eat what was made for dinner are consequently allowed to help themselves to something from the fridge but ONLY if they paid for the food out of their allowances I guess the thinking is that that the parents had already paid for one meal as part of their parental duties.There are some good ideas to be taken from this book, but I think the kind of parent who would pick this book up is the parent who s already doing a lot of the good stuff and probably doesn t need a book to pick up on it

  6. says:

    I realize that in some circles this book has a stong following, but I found it to be one of the most bizarre parenting books I ve ever reademphasis on talking sweetly and enforcing natural consequences, but in a twisted eye for an eye way Some of the examples were outright alarming Authors advocate a one size fits all parenting approach I was disappointed to read that they do not consider why a child is doing what they re doing nor are parents encouraged to figure out why In brie I realize that in some circles this book has a stong following, but I found it to be one of the most bizarre parenting books I ve ever reademphasis on talking sweetly and enforcing natural consequences, but in a twisted eye for an eye way Some of the examples were outright alarming Authors advocate a one size fits all parenting approach I was disappointed to read that they do not consider why a child is doing what they re doing nor are parents encouraged to figure out why In brief, parents should just stop talking and dole out the consequences For example, if a child is misbehaving in a restaurant, the authors recommend removing the child from the table and giving them a choice of walking or being carried out On the surface, that may seem fine, but it s still important to consider WHY the child is misbehaving Is she overtired Hungry because the service is slow Bored because her parents forgot to bring anything to occupy her All of these possible explanations are the parents responsibility if the child is young, and could be avoided with planning and consideration Removing the child to the car until they can be sweet again doesn t address the root cause of the behavior, nor does it sufficiently explain expectations e.g In a restaurant I expect you to sit still and use a quiet voice I could go on on with examples I found oversimplified each was heavy on the consequence but light on the teaching In their six step Uh Oh Song approach, the authors actually go so far as to say, Parent should not, and need not, talk with the child about the problem I ve read many books that share the same objective as these authors, but others providethoughtful, well reasoned guidance Recommendations include the Positive Discipline series, anything by the authors of How to Talk So Your Kid will Listen, Kurchinka s two great books 1 Spirited Child and 2 Power Struggles I also recommend Barbara Caruso s, Kids are Worth It It has several of the same goals as these authors teaching kids to be responsible, decision making individuals , but Caruso s book actually helps parents teach their kids to develop these skills, as opposed to letting external consequences be the only guidance

  7. says:

    In all fairness, had I written this review a couple weeks ago immediately after I read it, I probably would have given this book 3 stars But since then, the points of contention for me have continued to annoy me, therefor Jim and Foster, I bestow only 2 little stars for you I realize this book has great following and is perhaps the Child Raising Bible to many, however, I obviously was not sold.The premise of this book is that children learn from mistakes The natural consequences that occur In all fairness, had I written this review a couple weeks ago immediately after I read it, I probably would have given this book 3 stars But since then, the points of contention for me have continued to annoy me, therefor Jim and Foster, I bestow only 2 little stars for you I realize this book has great following and is perhaps the Child Raising Bible to many, however, I obviously was not sold.The premise of this book is that children learn from mistakes The natural consequences that occur from their actions teach the child to continue or change their behavior Example A child touches a hot stove The painful heat teaches the child not to do that again No parent involvement was necessary As parents, we counsel children, assisting them to see the problem at hand and brainstorm solutions for it Then we stay hands off in the follow through Owning the problem teaches them responsibility Some points I agree with As parents, we need to be counselors to our childrenWe should resist controlling our children s every decisionChildren learn responsibility from mistakesIf we do not allow them to fail, they will not learn to succeedNatural consequences are valuableSome points I do not agree with My first issue came at the beginning of the book, as the authors gave their own testimonials to their theories, telling the readers that if anything in the book seems to ruffle our feathers or that our gut reaction disagrees, it is simply because this is not how we were raised, and because we want to be enlightened to a better way, we need to push aside those feelings of discomfort and believe the book Ok, does this bring to mind The Emperor s New Clothes to anyone else The only people to question anything must be stupid, now who wants to speak up And all the wise adults stand by praising the non clothes of the Emperor in the parade I guess I just have gripes with someone even a reputable author telling me that my intuition or gut feelings are wrong and to blindly follow their expert advise I have no idea where my stubborn children got it from But really, I believe that we are given intuition and feelings to guide our lives, including regarding what we read.As parents, our role is solely to be counselors to our children not said in so many words, but all examples, etc led me to believe the authors truly end parental responsibility with counseling and advising To me, counseling is one of many parental roles And that role heightens as the child matures This book seemed to neglect the roles of modeling and training, but instead just threw the kids out into the world to learn from one painful mistake after another The authors advocate stepping in only at cost of loss of limb or life I believe there are also other consequences with a price tag too high to risk Some mistakes may eventually be learned through natural consequences, but what if that same lesson could have been learned in a muchtimely manner without sacrificing years to the lesson You can t get those years back.Not all correct choices feel good, and not all bad choices feel bad Sometimes we sacrifice external rewards in making the better choice If we rely soley on others reactions, we may succeed in some people s eyes in the short run But really, can anyone please everyone And should that be our goal Of course not So to teach our children to measure their success in such a way is ludicrous

  8. says:

    This book encourages parents to be mean, authoritarian and bordering on abusive It advises parents run a boot camp for their children to learn to be responsible using trickery and sarcasm I suspect this book appeals to those with certain values different from mine, and I feel sorry for their children Much of the language encouraged by the book was disrespectful towards the children For instance, ina demonstration, without warning the mom gave away a girl s puppy because she wasn t taking car This book encourages parents to be mean, authoritarian and bordering on abusive It advises parents run a boot camp for their children to learn to be responsible using trickery and sarcasm I suspect this book appeals to those with certain values different from mine, and I feel sorry for their children Much of the language encouraged by the book was disrespectful towards the children For instance, ina demonstration, without warning the mom gave away a girl s puppy because she wasn t taking care of it according to the parent s standards , when the girl begged the mom to go bring it back, the mother said, You must be kiddingI just took the dog over there Now I m supposed to bring her back Do you think I m an idiot My jaw dropped I had made an agreement with myself to finish this book to glean something useful from it, but now I am afraid of absorbing any of its principles I do not recommend this book, and am saddened it has received such a good review

  9. says:

    There are a lot of great techniques in this book, but some that I question It seems that the object of LL parenting is to be constantly teaching the child a lesson I think that sometimes going out of your way to teach them a lesson is artificial and even on occasion harsh I think about the way our Father in Heaven would parent us He allows us to suffer the consequences of our mistakes but doesn t rub it in , or set us up for failure.Having listened to a number of LL cds and read There are a lot of great techniques in this book, but some that I question It seems that the object of LL parenting is to be constantly teaching the child a lesson I think that sometimes going out of your way to teach them a lesson is artificial and even on occasion harsh I think about the way our Father in Heaven would parent us He allows us to suffer the consequences of our mistakes but doesn t rub it in , or set us up for failure.Having listened to a number of LL cds and read a couple of the books I also feel that the authors have a very limited number of lessons to teach, they just keep repackaging them in order to makemoney I have a limited tolerance for parenting experts who are so self promoting

  10. says:

    I didn t read the whole book, just the first couple chapters, then I skimmed through the rest.Some things I really liked and am trying to use Giving choices I agree that kids should be able to choose whenever possible rather than me telling them what to do What do you want to do first Go to the bathroom or get your shoes on That s easy enough, and then they fight it a little less Choosing consequences that fit the mistake Hard to do, but it makes sense I like the energy drain Your f I didn t read the whole book, just the first couple chapters, then I skimmed through the rest.Some things I really liked and am trying to use Giving choices I agree that kids should be able to choose whenever possible rather than me telling them what to do What do you want to do first Go to the bathroom or get your shoes on That s easy enough, and then they fight it a little less Choosing consequences that fit the mistake Hard to do, but it makes sense I like the energy drain Your fighting is giving me an energy drain What are you going to do to get my energy back Chores Okay Letting consequences teach, not the lecture Adalyn is at that stage when she knows that if she just agrees with us, we ll stop telling her what to do quicker It s nice to give her that trust that she can make her own decisions, and let her feel the consequences of those decisions An example would be wearing flip flops or shoes to the park I can tell her to wear shoes, and every time she ll whine that she wants flip flops I ve been letting them choose, and the other day Connor chose flip flops He was constantly stopping to get wood chips out of his shoes Not too fun.Things I really really really did not like Some of their scenarios sounded just plain dangerous I am not going to let my four year old get beat up to teach him not to bother others I don t care what he says, you can bet I will do something about it if I see someone hitting him That s protection, and it s my job to help keep him safe He can have the consequence of having no friends if he wants to talk unkindly to others, not a beating Their whole idea on praise just didn t sit right with me I understand avoiding insincere praise, but they seem to want to avoid any use of You did good or Great job Instead they suggest asking the child what they did and leaving it at that It s fine to ask them their opinion, I m sure, but it s not just going to go How do you think you did Crappy Oh I m sorry you feel that way That seems destructive Anytime the child comes to you with a problem, you re supposed to hand it right back to them That s your problem, not mine sort of a thing I want my kids to be able to come to me when they have issues, and I want them to feel like they can talk to me and that I will be able to help them if they want it, not that I ll just say, Sucks for you What are you going to do about it Part of my job as a parent is to help guide them which still isn t telling them what to do, but it s not leaving them to their own devices We actually did try this for a day or so, and Adalyn was near tears by the end of it You always say that, why won t you just help me Not the message I want her to get.I think it all comes down to respect We respect our children as capable of making their own decisions age appropriate, of course and help them make safe and correct decisions when they need it I got a lotfrom the talk from April 2011 conference, What manner of men and women ought ye to be by Elder Lynn G Robbins Condemn the sin, not the sinner Never use phrases like You always or How many times must I tell you guilty Help them to become Christlike by acting Christlike towards them being a good example I like when he said that, We will never have a greater opportunity to teach and show Christlike attributes to our children than in the way we discipline them That s what I need to be working on Respect

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